5 Signs You Need to Practice More Self-Compassion
Self-compassion often gets misunderstood as being soft, indulging, or letting yourself off the hook. In reality, being kind to yourself is one of the strongest foundations you can build for emotional health, resilience, and growth. If you’ve been tough on yourself lately, these five signs may show that cultivating self-compassion is something you’d deeply benefit from.
1. You’re Your Own Worst Critic
Do you repeatedly replay situations in your mind, harshly judging your actions: “I messed up,” “I should have done better,” “I always fail”? If self-judgment is a regular companion, it can erode confidence and amplify anxiety. Self‐compassion helps you replace harsh inner dialogue with a kinder, more balanced perspective.
2. You Feel Guilty for Putting Your Needs First
Many people believe self-care or setting boundaries is selfish. This leads to suppressing your own needs—whether rest, saying “no,” or pursuing passions. If you frequently feel guilty for caring about yourself, cultivating self-compassion can help remind you that you deserve kindness just like anyone else.
3. Minor Mistakes Spiral Into Major Self-Criticism
We all make mistakes. But if everyday slip-ups turn into long ruminations of shame or harsh self-punishment, that’s a sign your internal critic is overpowering your self-compassion. Learning to treat yourself with kindness during failure can reduce stress and improve emotional recovery.
4. You Compare Yourself to Others Constantly
Scrolling through social media, hearing about others’ successes, and immediately feeling you fall short? Comparison can fuel insecurity, jealousy, and depression. Self-compassion shifts the focus—your journey, your progress, your values—rather than someone else’s highlight reel.
5. You Have a Hard Time Accepting Support from Others
Do you push people away when they try to help? Do you believe you have to do everything on your own, or that admitting vulnerability is weakness? If so, this resistance often stems from fear of being seen as weak or unworthy. Self-compassion opens you up to giving and receiving kindness—from yourself and others.
How to Start Practising Self-Compassion Today
Notice your inner critic. When you hear harsh self-judgment, pause and name it.
Reframe with kindness. What would you say to a friend in the same situation? Try saying that to yourself.
Mindful self-discovery. Journaling about where criticism comes from (past experiences, beliefs) helps loosen its grip.
Give yourself permission. Schedule “self-care”—rest, creativity, doing nothing—and see it as essential, not optional.
Reach out. Talk with someone who can support compassion: a friend, mentor, or therapist.
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Is self-compassion the same as being self-indulgent or lazy?
Can self-compassion help with anxiety or burnout?
How long does it take to feel the effects?
Does practising self-compassion mean I stop holding myself accountable?
Ready to Transform Your Relationship with Yourself?
If any of the above resonate—if you’ve been relentlessly critical, overburdened, comparing, or feeling unworthy—this may be the moment to lean into self-compassion. It’s a journey, not a destination, but every step you take matters.
You don’t need to go it alone. Speaking with someone—a trusted friend, mentor, or mental health professional—can provide tools, encouragement, and perspective to support this change.